Hitting Rachel
by GladeSistas
Summary: My sister and I came up with this story while watching Batman Begins. We hate Rachel, and we wanted to write this. WARNING: RACHEL FANS BEWARE! TONS OF HILARIOUS RACHEL BASHING INCLUDED! Please read and review!


_Disclaimer: We don't own Batman Begins . . . (sob)_

_**WARNING! MAJOR RACHEL BASHING!**_

_Hey, Kiera and I were talking about how much we hate Rachel, and well; this was born. _

_We love the actress, just not the character, so don't get mad at what happens. _

_REVIEW PLEASE!!_

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**Chapter One**

**The Beginning**

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"Auburn hurry, I REALLY have to go!" Lila cried dragging her best friend out of the theater and to the bathroom.

"Lila, can't you wait a while?" Auburn complained. "The Dark Knight just got to the best part!" The friends were in the movie theater for about the third time that month; seeing the Dark Knight for about the sixth time since it came out.

"WELL WHEN I PEE IN MY PANTS YOU'LL BE SORRY THEN WON'T YOU!" Lila screamed running in search of a bathroom.

"Why did you drink that large soda then?" Auburn asked incredulously. "You knew you would have to go at some point!" Lila ignored her and spun in circles frantically.

"IT'S GONE! OH GOD! WHAT WILL I DO NOW! I'M DONE FOR!" Lila shrieked falling to her knees. Auburn sighed and pointed at the ladies restroom in a dark corner of the hall. "Oh," Lila said. "YES! COME ON!" Lila grabbed Auburn's arm and pulled her into the bathroom.

Suddenly, Auburn noticed the light shift, and it seemed to get darker. She frowned while Lila relieved herself.

"Ahh, that's better," Lila said. Then she glanced around too. "Did it just get darker?" She asked. Auburn shrugged.

"How should I know?" Auburn said. "Let's go back, we're missing the Joker."

They walked out of the bathroom, and to their amazement; they weren't in the movie theater. Their mouths fell open. The architecture was beautiful and intricate, there were statues made of gold. Blood red curtains covered some of the walls, and a grand chandelier hung from the ceiling. Lila groaned but Auburn recognized where they were.

"Aww, we're missing the Dark Knight!" Lila protested. Auburn rolled her eyes then stopped.

"Lila!" Auburn shushed her. "Do you know where we are?" Lila looked around then gasped out loud.

"OH MY GOD! We're in Batman Begins!" Lila squealed. "In the very beginning! Bruce and his parents are about to come out of the side doors I bet!" Lila ran to the exit.

"Lila! Lila WAIT!" Auburn shouted. They ran out and found themselves in the dark alley. Bruce's mother had just gotten shot. Lila stopped short. Child Bruce was sitting by his parent's dead bodies crying. Auburn ran up to him.

"Oh what happened sweetie?" Auburn said gathering him in her arms. Lila stood still, crying silently.

"A man came and tried to take my dad's money. The man took his wallet, then was going to shoot Mom, but Dad jumped in front of her. Then the man shot Mom too," Child Bruce choked out. "It's all my fault." Lila came up and hugged him too.

"It's not your fault Bruce," Lila said. Auburn froze.

"How do you know my name?" Child Bruce said sniffing.

"Umm . . ." Lila looked at Auburn desperately.

"We recognized your Dad, Bruce," Auburn invented wildly. "We worked with him at the hospital. I'm going to call the police now alright?" Child Bruce nodded and grabbed onto Lila. Auburn dug into her purse and ripped out her cell phone. She dialed 911.

"911, what's your emergency?" A woman said on the other line.

"Hello? We need help right away, two people were just shot," Auburn said urgently.

"Are they dead?" The women asked. Auburn scoffed. How insensitive.

"Yes, but their son is here. We need someone to come."

"Oh dear. Where are you?"

"By the opera house," Auburn said. "In a dark alleyway."

"Alright, someone will be there shortly." Auburn thanked her then hung up. A few minutes later, they heard police sirens coming closer.

"I'll go get them," Lila offered. She ran up the alleyway and to the police car. "Oh thank you so much for coming!" She said to the police officer's back. He stood up and turned.

"No problem," He said. "I'm James Gordon." Lila screamed. Gordon jumped in shock. "What happened?" He cried confused.

"Umm . . . I saw a giant bug just now, I'm so sorry," Lila said. Gordon raised an eyebrow but dropped it.

"Where did it happen?" He asked. Lila led him to Auburn and Bruce. Auburn opened her mouth to speak then shut it immediately seeing who the police officer was. Gordon's jaw dropped as he caught sight of who was shot. "Wayne?" He said dubiously. Auburn nodded. Gordon spoke into his walkie talkie and suddenly, everything froze.

--

The world spiraled, and all of a sudden Auburn and Lila found themselves in a different alleyway.

"What the heck?" Lila said. They walked around until they saw a car. They heard Rachel talking in a speech tone. Then Bruce started talking.

"All these years I wanted to kill him." Bruce said. "Now I can't." Auburn gasped when she saw the glint of a gun in Bruce's hand. Lila fumed silently when Rachel slapped him twice.

"You're father would be ashamed of you," Rachel said quietly.

"Excuse me," Lila said tapping on the car window. Rachel and Bruce looked bewildered and rolled it down. "Is there a problem here?" Lila said too sweetly. Rachel opened her mouth to respond when Lila lunged at her through the window. "YOU URINE DRINKING HOBO! WHAT THE HECK IS WRONG WITH YOU?!" Lila let out a long stream of profanities while punching everything and everything she could reach. Bruce and Auburn stared on in shock. Auburn finally snapped out of it and pulled Lila back.

"I am so SO sorry about that Bruce!" Auburn apologized. Rachel scowled angrily.

"What about me?" She cried. Auburn smirked.

"Oh, you deserved that. You are such a -" Auburn said calling Rachel a very naughty name. Rachel's mouth fell open as Lila giggled.

"Yeah!" She said. Lila turned to Bruce. "You are so amazing Bruce, I LOVE YOU!" Bruce blinked confused. Then recognition dawned on his face.

"Didn't you two help me when my parents were murdered?" He asked. Lila's face darkened and she pulled out a flashlight out of nowhere. She flicked it on and held it under her chin, creating an eerie shadow.

"We are the ghosts of the past, present, and future," She said mysterously. "We will meet again."

--

_Well, we were going to make this a one-shot; but then we were actually watching Batman Begins, and now we're into it. So we've decided to make this an actual story. MUAHAHAHA! Much more Rachel bashing to come, please send us anything you would like to see! _

_REVIEW WITH IDEAS!_

_Emma and Kiera_


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